Monday the 10th of December

Today I started a new combination therapy that has an integrase inhibitor but about this tomorrow.

Now a lot of my "rubbish" or "bullshit" follows so you are where that this means that if you dont want to read todays post fine lovely , I just needed to get it out of my "system".

Yesterday I finished a book and started another that promised to be very interesting (The Upanishads) but before I tell you about the new book I better tell you .

The book I finished reading yesterday mentiones that violence and evil belongs to the dark side, well if we look around violence belongs to the light side not to the dark side and evil, the devil or any deamon are creations of the creator of god that is the human being; God has not any opposite, its unique by itself so obviously the devil and his servants has to be a creature but (suprise, suprise!) the existence of a concept about the devil begins with christianity because before this religion (and its only that one of many religions that human kind had and still have) divine conceptions in other religions had a light and a dark side at the same time. Violence I think is just a reaction to FEAR there is unfortunately another fear with not so much importance except that it has been created as a response to the FEAR. Therefore violence belongs as a fear to the light side as a reaction of FEAR that some would like to put in the dark side (the dark side is not complaining!). In Yin and Yang from Taoism we find that light is mascculine and dark feminine, however we have colour white as feminine and black as masculine; is this a contradiction? I do not think so, because if you look at the symbol of Yin and Yang , it is a black half circle with a white side circle but the black has something of the white and the white has something of the black. And guess who is having the most of the violence in this world? MEN (well I better keep it as secret now, I am a men myslef).

Let me elaborate a bit more about FEAR. This FEAR was created at the begining and will stop existing at the end, animals react with fear when they face that and perhaps the differeciation between homosapiens and all the other subspecies of hominidious is that ability to face fear, to stand fear not to run away when fear faces them in short not to be an animal; of course from an evolutionary point of view homo sapiens are animals but we have capacities that differenciate us quite well from the other animal like the ability to stand in front of panic, fear or to the capacity of creating it for the sake of making a story, we call it "makebelief" and I dont think this capacity to stand fear and from fantasy to create it is present in any other animal (well I might be wrong) some people make us belief that there if FEAR that needs to confronted with their solution/fear, one of them is violence , another is religions, another one is different sexualities and even another one is drugs; why this last one, well think about it, some of the drugs have very interesting names like heroin - a female hero that sorts out something that is wrong, some others are called "crack" and what is that ? an opening through you can get out; and as the addictions "hook" on the person those names change into "shit" and all because its the fear that we try to be fighting of the other FEAR.

I am lost now. I was talking about something and I forgot how it continues.

This is the problem of being out in the cloud cuculand with ferries, anyway you know what I meant.

DOES O O O DOES O O O DOES

Yesterday I started to read a very interesting book that I told you before the title. Although I am reading only the introduction so far I found a few "pearls of wisdom".

"...One of the messages of the Upanishads is that the Spirit can only be known through union with him, and not through mere learning. ...."

"...Who sees variety and not the unity wanders on from death to death..."

"... The Christian must feel that Brahman is God, and the Hindu must feel that God is Brahman..."

All of them in page eleven in the introduction. I do like very much this book but dont worry I am not going to become Hindu as I do like very much "the peak and mix" period that I am having at the moment in my life but who knows maybe I am allowed to be crazy and at the same time to enjoy this wisdom. Ill tell you more as I find out about it.

DOES O O O DOES O O O DOES

Sometimes I reffer to the health complication I have as if it was a coctail so people can understand better what is happening; I say that if you put in a coctail shaker a little bit of parkinsons, a little bit of alzhaimers and a little bit of MS after you shake vigorusly the end end result is very approximate to what I have. Of course there is something else but I cannot explain it very well. Using the example of the coctail shaker if you put in it well measures Capitalism and Comunism with a few drops of Anarchy after shaking well you serve on a glass with a straw and a slice of lemon/lime that we could call democracy for the sake of it we would have the ideal political estate and so far we have something for the last 10 years in this country that used to be very much like 70 per cent of Christian social democracy, 20 percent of Capitalism and 5 per cent of sindicalism obviously shake well with a joke of a slice of democracy and the straw only if needed but usually was in so some poeple coulde still/ spin the result ; I dont know what we have now. Most certainly we have the straw but what else I dont know just yet.